Certified Infidelity Recovery Coaching...is coming soon!
Well that is my plan! When starting this podcast, I felt I could help women who have been unfaithful have a place to turn to. Not to condone and cheer them on, but to have someone who won't judge and will listen and understand. It can be a very lonely place to be. In your mind you know what you are doing is completely wrong. You may ask yourself why you can't stop? The constant distraction in your mind about your affair partner, the constant panic and worry about being caught. The excitement it brings with the newness of the affair as perhaps you a person feels that their current relationship has gone stale and this "other" person makes you feel like you once did. So many emotions, that one has to keep to themselves. So, a person on the outside may say...well if you know its wrong then don't do it. So much easier said than done.
Looking in, its always easier to tell people to say this, or do that...but when it comes down to it, every circumstance is different and its not a black and white situation. What about an alcoholic? They are very addicted to it...for someone to say...just stop. You know its wrong. Just don't do it! We know that is NOT how it works. People with any sort of an addiction, or dependency (and infidelity cases...the feeling, energy, lust from the affair partner) needs to have someone or others to help through the challenges facing them with acknowledging the problem, learning how to cope, avoid being pulled back in, talk to someone when feeling weak, celebrating their accomplishment etc.
For infidelity, many women (and men) have told NO one so they are going through this alone which adds to confusion. Everyday in life, things come up and we tend to bounce things off of others. Now imagine struggling with your decisions and having no one to talk to for fear of judgment or them turning on you and telling your spouse or partner. Yes, one can say, well you shouldn't have put yourself in that situation to begin with, and yes, I agree to a point. However, people don't usually go into marriages with the plans for all of a sudden being attracted and pulled emotionally or sexually to another person. Most of the time, I hear, I was so against cheating people, I can't believe I am doing it myself. It can be easy to slip if a person is in a vulnerable place and someone happens to walk into their lives unexpectedly. Once you cross that line though, there is no going back. At that point, when the line is crossed, it opens up a whole other issue. Getting caught! A person is free to make choices in life that they want, but they have to face consequences based on their choices. Good or bad choice will equate to good or bad consequences.
As a podcaster and woman who was unfaithful to my now ex-husband, I can only do so much. I wish at times I could reach out and hug these people! I just want to help, but I also know I need training for circumstance I may not be fully aware of. Earlier this year, I began researching on becoming a therapist but knowing I probably do not have the time and resources to start such a huge program....so it stalled out...but still stayed on my mind. That is until I received a message from a man who had been working through his wife's infidelity and a messy custody battle and divorce. He had just seen a divorce coach and told me that I would be a good coach for infidelity. I was blown away for two reasons. One being that I had not even heard nor thought of that and the second that what I was doing to help others was being noticed and complimented.
After researching, I found the perfect program. I am so thankful to be able to start this study and take this all a step further.
Of course, this will now become a business and will have to take the steps for assuring I have all my ducks in a row before accepting clients. I hope to someday, continue helping people all over the world (thanks to the internet and virtual meetings) and be able to leave my 31 years in dentistry. That means, I will get to charge for my time.
I will keep everyone posted and will eventually add my services to my website! If its meant to be, it will happen! I love doing the podcast, narrating and producing audio books for authors and now the opportunity to help others in a more, educated way!